Last January I was at a conference and the worship leader
shared the Lord’s challenge to her. “Will you say ‘YES’ to the Lord, even
before you know what the question is?” Because He is always good and always
faithful, I have said a major “Yes, Lord” with hands surrendered and a heart
open to what He has in store in this upcoming season of my life.
I will be going on a
sabbatical for six months, departing Uganda October 3rd (and
returning early April 2016).
You can read the letter I sent out to friends, family and
supporters below.
This is a major step of faith and obedience. I feel so
confirmed by loved ones’ words and encouragement. I feel excited to see what
the Lord will do. I feel so happy at the thought of seeing my family and
friends. But, I also feel sad to leave my big family in Uganda. And, I feel a bit nervous because my everyday life, friends, ministry and space are in Uganda.
Please pray for me during this last month, as I prepare to
go on sabbatical. Pray for me to accomplish all that I need to do. Pray that my
heart will be steady in saying (temporary) goodbyes. And, pray that I will hear
the Father’s voice as to what I am to do that day, and that I will continue
living in the moment.
My home base will be
my parents’ house in Burnet, Texas. But,
I also hope to travel.
There are a few needs that I have:
- * MAJOR
NEED: A trustworthy and economical car to borrow for the 6 months I am in
the states.
- * Many of my supporters have graciously committed
to continue their financial support, but it does not cover all my anticipated
monthly costs.
-
I would love to know about any connections or
information you have about “missionary
retreats” or “soul care” opportunities (or any other thing you think would be
beneficial that I might be too “out of
the loop” to know about).
Specific Prayer Requests:
- * For friendships. I grew up in Austin, not Burnet,
and have only met a few people the brief time I was there over Christmas. I
admit this is one of my biggest worries. I love friends and hosting people and
getting together and being included and the close friendships that I have are
spread throughout Texas and the USA, not near Burnet.
- * For an opportunity to meet regularly with an
older Christian mentor.
- * Joy in the tension of the goodbyes and last
minute details.
- * For my hands and heart to be open, trusting and
accepting of activities and changes that will happen at Lulwanda while I am
gone. (Specifically, that my heart would be OK with being “left out” or
“unaware.”)
- * For my health to be strong (I currently have malaria for the second time in two months)
Thank you for your faithful prayers.
Sabbatical Letter Sent to Friends,
Family, and Supporters:
Dear Friend,
May 2nd
marked eight years in Uganda. Eight years of living life in a different
culture. Eight years of building relationships with many wonderful people.
Eight years of watching children grow and change. Eight years of saying joyous
hellos and heart wrenching goodbyes. Eight years of seeing Scripture come to
life. Eight years of being humbled by “mzungu thinking” that values timetables
and to do lists over relationships. Eight years of walking by faith and seeing
God move in the big and the small. These eight years hold some of my life’s
biggest highs, but also some of its lows.
And, after eight years,
I feel God doing something in my heart that is a bit unsettling. In addition to
stirring my heart emotionally, on a practical level, I feel that He asking me to uproot physically
from Uganda - at least for a while.
I have spent much time
in prayer and waiting over what this unsettled feeling is about because, when I
think of packing up and saying goodbye to Uganda “forever,” it puts my heart in
great distress. But, I also know that the Lord is doing something and I don’t
feel peaceful about everything staying “as is.”
In March, I was able to
attend a women’s retreat in Kenya. After two days of sessions talking about
God’s sovereignty, the ever looming questions that were constantly in the back
of my head rushed to the forefront. They were all consuming.
In that moment I
prayed, “Lord, what do I do with this unsettled feeling? How much longer do you
want me in Uganda? Is it time to move back to the USA? What in the world would
I do there? What about my life here? What about all the children at LCH; I love
them so much. How do I say goodbye to them?”
One of the guest
speakers at the retreat spent 10 years as a missionary in western Uganda. Since
returning to the States, she became a pastoral counselor. I had the opportunity
to meet with her one-on-one and share the state of my heart. As I shared my
feelings and desires to be obedient to the Lord’s will, my heart ached and my
eyes flooded with tears over the thought that the unsettled feeling might mean
leaving my life in Uganda forever. After hearing me sob through my story, she
graciously and matter-of-factly asked, “Well, have you thought about a
sabbatical?”
The truth is YES, I
have. Many times. But, I always discounted it because I didn’t really think I
was worthy of one, nor did I understand the meaning of a sabbatical for people
in full-time ministry.
As I continued to speak
with her, she said, “Maybe the answer is not A or B, but maybe it is C and a
sabbatical is that C.” She also said, “It is obvious to me that thinking of
leaving Uganda forever puts your heart in great distress, but you are not at
peace in remaining. How does thinking about a sabbatical make you feel?” My
response was “peaceful.”
Now, three months after
this conversation, I have had time to think and pray about taking a sabbatical
and the idea brings great peace. I know that I need a time of rest. I know that
I need a time to reflect on the past eight years and to surrender and pray about
the years to come. I know that for nine months I have been praying for the Lord
to give me some new hopes and Jesus dreams, and I’ve felt that He has been
fairly silent. But, as I think of a sabbatical, a handful of dreams and ideas
enter my thinking. I know that I am not ready to pack my belongings, say my
goodbyes, and end my life in Uganda right now. But, I also know that I would be
walking in disobedience if I didn’t take some sort of break.
As I begin this
sabbatical, I feel like my decision to remain in Uganda or return to the USA
for the next years of my life is 50/50. But, I am confident that He, my loving
Father in Heaven, knows the plans He has for me. I can rest in that truth.
So, I am asking you –
my friends, family, supporters and prayer warriors – will you pray with me in
this season? Will you pray for rest, encouragement and rejuvenation? Will you
pray for clarity about where the Lord is leading me next and bravery to say
“yes”?
I am planning to leave
Uganda in early October and remain in the USA until April, when I will return
in time to plan for next year’s summer teams at LCH. My hope and desire while
in the USA is to have a chance to really rest, refresh and reflect. I also hope
that my time involves visiting with many of you. Your care, concern and love
bring rejuvenation to my spirit!
As I begin planning the
practical aspects of meeting my basic needs would you consider continuing your
financial support while I am on sabbatical? You have been so extremely generous
in partnering with me in my ministry while in Uganda.
Thank you for standing
with me. I love you.
Natalie
